Many of my sex therapy clients expose themselves to websites and social media with some treatment of sex. Some of these sites and social media are accurate with an evidence-based and logical approach to sex and relationships, but there is often inaccurate and biased information and recommendations.

For example, sites such as No Fap and Your Brain on Porn are riddled with false and damaging information. These sites are run by those with no real credentials with an ax to grind. The ax typically is intended to chop up and promote dangerous suggestions. It is wrong to state that masturbation is a bad thing or that all porn is inaccurate and harmful.

Some media report what these sites say as if they are authoritative. They are far from helpful, because they promulgate moralistic conclusions which are nothing but hogwash. Worse yet, sites such as No Fap and Your Brain on Porn promote sex negative suggestions. We need a sex positive depiction of human sexuality. This gets lost in the barrage of politically correct and strident moralizing.

Some of these sites wrongly interpret sex research. We need to leave it to real sex researchers and sex therapists to offer genuine insights about sex. Wikipedia is an example of a mixture of accurate and inaccurate information. It is compiled by volunteers—not always by real professionals.

In addition to inaccuracies, some of the sex negative sites have threatened sex researchers who differ with their suggestions. This ties in with the false allegation that there is such a thing as sex addiction and porn addiction. There are lawsuits and continued threats against those who take an evidence-based and sex positive approach.

Social media are riddled with sex negative trivia in the guise of accurate conclusions. These wrong- headed observations are damaging to self-esteem and to reputations. So-called “influencers” on Tik Tok, Facebook, Instagram and other social media are not experts. They are not to be taken seriously. Teenagers believe these influencers to be authoritative. This is crazy.

People need to become critical thinkers rather than blind followers of trash talk. The Internet and social media offer a mish mash of helpful and totally unhelpful information. Disinformation is much too common. We see this with politicians who lie and their followers who believe their lies. Our democracy is at stake. We need evidence-based conclusions.

Science is a far better basis for sex information than misleading and unscientific shame-based moralizing. There are private groups on Facebook that deal with all of this in a rational and evidence-based way. Some accurate public sites about sex and porn have been dropped due to threats, including lawsuits.

I help my clients with all of this. As an AASECT sex therapist, I help those exposed to biased information to understand what is real and what is falsehood masquerading as fact. In conclusion, research the sites you are exposed to. Find out if they are by real experts, or by those posing as experts. Wade through all of this with some caution. There is accurate information out there, but you have to be careful to sort through it all!

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