Older people are often in need of help to continue being sexual. In is too common to contend that senior citizens are too old to be sexual, but this is untrue.

senior couple hikingThere are sometimes health and medical reasons for older people not having sex, but many of these issues can be resolved with proper medical and mental health intervention. This is true of seniors living on their own as well as those in retirement homes.

Barring health limitations, there is no reason for seniors to give up on being sexual. Some re alone. They can masturbate and perhaps find suitable lovers. I see seniors in my practice ranging in age from 65 to the 90’s. Most need encouragement and insights, which I provide.

Those in retirement homes often are faced with institutional rules which make it hard to be sexual. Seniors need privacy and they need information. A helpful guide is available for seniors in retirement homes. It is Guide to Sexual Health and STIs in Retirement Homes.  Those on their own can also profit from this guide.

Sexually transmitted infections definitely affect seniors too. Seniors should be tested for diseases, and they should be careful in what they do sexually. Some use condoms, especially if they have sex with more than one lover. Diseases are one indicator that many seniors still have a variety of sexual acts. Some still are able to have intercourse, while others focus on manual and oral genital stimulation.

Erections are often a problem to be solved. The combination of a urologist or general practitioner and a sex therapist usually can solve erection problems as well as delayed ejaculation in men. Women can be helped with lubrication, pain and orgasm by doctors and sex therapists working together.

I do couples therapy with seniors to enhance their communication and to improve their sex lives. Without help, many do not know how to continue to be sexual and intimate. I also recommend Joan Price’s books for sex among seniors. Two of her books are Naked at Our Age and Ultimate Guide to Sex after 50.

The reality is that senior citizens have similar sexual and relationship concerns when compared with those who are younger. Seniors can learn to enjoy sexual intimacy and to reinvent their sexual expression. The lack of available lovers can be addressed with a competent therapist. I deal with all of this.

Since we live longer lives, we need to address these issues for seniors. It is too bad that some professionals are either unwilling or incompetent to do so. Seniors are sometimes too embarrassed to ask for help. Professionals need to ask for them. They need to address their concerns by asking them about them. As I stated in my TED Talk, seniors need information, advice and privacy to be sexual. Our society owes this to them!

Again, sex is not always intercourse, Seniors need more touch, which can include sexual touch. Cuddling, massage and emotional intimacy are all helpful! I address all of these nuances when I see senor individuals and senor couples.

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