SexfromAtoZexcerpts_copy_pdf_16What’s the hottest sex you ever had?

Meeting up with a high school girlfriend or boyfriend and (finally) getting it on—all the way? Letting the woman down the street seduce you? Being tied up, blindfolded and teased into multiple orgasms?

These are erotic flashbacks—or flesh-backs! Almost everyone has one, two or many. The more erotic memories you can conjure up, the richer and more robust your sex life can be.

We can use erotic flashbacks to enhance our sexual pleasures, recreate that hot night when you agreed to a threesome, let your lover insert ben wa balls, and lose yourself in scintillating orgasms.

You may have a few mind-blowing orgasmic memories, or you may have many. All are fertile ground for your next sexual encounter.

It is interesting to fantasize about erotic flashbacks about unforgettable lust with a hot lover. Memories of undulating flesh ten years ago can become in-the-moment explicit excitement. Orgasms in the present can be orchestrated by an erotic map from yesteryear. One—and sometimes two—revisit their past orgasms with vivid recollections of pheromone-fueled animalistic sex.

Irresistible chemistry with uncharted newness and the hint of something taboo inspire unbridled lust. Examples of these combined titillations might be a student with her or his professor, a boss with his secretary or a doctor with his nurse. Risk-taking taboo encounters often stimulate erotic fantasies and real life lust. Such temptations and flirtations make for arousing sexual encounters that are excitedly remembered as erotic flashbacks—or flesh-backs!

Some of these flashbacks are kept to oneself, while others cannot help but ignite horniness with a playful flair. Some explicit memories are dreams or fantasies inspiring self-pleasuring. Others are erotic maps for present and future debauchery and languid decadence between two willing sex fiends! Erotic flashbacks conjure up explicit visual details of steamy sex that actually happened.

Some excitedly recall how they encountered an acquaintance or a friend in a spontaneous way, such as “She made direct eye contact as she began fondling and kissing me on her balcony. Then she unzipped my pants, went down on me and took off her clothes!”

The mind is our main sex organ—not the genitals. The mind orchestrates and titillates desires of willing flesh by sending sex-positive signals down the nerves in the spine to the genitals. What, who and how do different people fantasize to arouse themselves and their partners? The mind can be delightfully used to escalate arousal and orgasms.

Desire is a wonderfully erotic concept. Desire varies by our hormones, by sexual chemistry, by our exercise regimen and by our overall health, including sleep and diet. Healthy people are sexual. They do not block their fantasies with unhealthy guilt and shame. They embrace sexual enthusiasm as a thrill to experience!

Desire and playful spontaneity varies by the health of a relationship. When there are no resentments and two people feel close, desire and sexual adventures are bound to escalate with giddy glee.

Fox News and other media discourage unrestrained lust by pushing a repressive “sex addiction” view where normal people are put down as “promiscuous” or a “man whore” if they have more sex than the user of these unfortunate terms. These sex-negative words are barbs thrown at anyone who appear to have fun with sex.

Some of us promote responsible sexual enthusiasm and collaborative fantasies and memories. There are brave souls who practice polyamory, swinging or open relationships in an honest, caring manner. Monogamy suits some, but not all. It is totally unrealistic to expect everyone to be sexually exclusive. We say we live in a monogamous society, but the truth is that we are in some way permanently available to each other under some circumstance.

We will continue to use the past to enhance present fantasies and to relish new encounters, but it is also advisable to create new fantasies, and to erotically act on some of them. More fantasies can be shared with a potential or actual lover to orchestrate and stimulate new sexual adventures so we don’t limit ourselves to the past.

Ideally, being open to new sexual scenarios adds to our erotic resume. It is unnecessary to limit our fantasies to memories of long ago thrills. Unless we allow others to judge us for our desire for new and spontaneous encounters, we are free to revel in raging pheromones and hormones.

We choose to have or not to have erotic experiences. Some believe they do not have a choice—that they must limit their desires because of parental or other social disapproval. Those who have the most robust and varied sex lives do so by their own volition.

Guilt and shame are censors appointed by religious or other strict admonitions and boring, antiquated rules. We do not have to succumb to moralists. We can live our fantasies in our everyday lives if we refuse to give in to negative thinking and emotions promoted by repressed authority figures.

Sometimes past erotic encounters encourage us to expand our orgasmic horizons into the pleasure of the moment. We can relish these moments with willing lovers if we playfully communicate our desire for non-vanilla sex. Variety is the spice of life—including within monogamy. We experience this with our desire for succulent foods. Why should sex be an exception?

Toward this end, why not make a list of your most thrilling erotic flashbacks so you can recreate them with your lover—and with yourself? Discussing memories of intimate and lusty real life experiences can ignite similar magnetism in the present. Why not see if I am right?!